This is about a topic close to my heart......was inspired after reading Orchid's post on Family.I have always felt that children grow up different when they are far away from their family(grandparents,cousins,aunts,uncles).The kind of love,attention and affection that they get from their grandparents is very different from the parents.Thathas and paatis(in Tamil for grandparents) let the kids do anything and everything and go on to become their secret buddies,hiding the mischiefs from the parent.It is a kind of relationship which can not be shared by any other.
My niece would happily spend the entire weekend with my mom ,who becomes a child with her and does and acts just the way my niece wants her to.She would stop doing everything around the house and will sit and play with her.I would love for my daughter to get that kind of a 'play patner'.We,as parents can never give them so much,due to various constraints- time,patience,other responsibility which takes over priority.
I will always feel bad that Miss D is missing out on so much fun by not knowing and playing with her cousins and not getting that endless, abundant love from her grand parents.We are depriving them of those precious relationships in life,which are such important building blocks.But these are the choices that we make and have to face the challenges that come with it.
I am thankful that my pumpkin enjoyed the last 5 months with my mother-in-law.She would read to her,fold the clothes from the dryer for Miss D to mess it up,then fold it again so that Miss D would mess it up all over again:-)She would just spend the entire morning,by hanging around next to her grandma.These are the moments that we have to cherish and hold on to close to our hearts.
3 comments:
MDM, I really enjoyed this post. You have a really nice site here.. I am with you on your thoughts about far away family.. It is true that we miss out on so many things in each other's life when the family is far away.. My daughter cherishes the time she spent with her grandparents and always looks forward to seeing them again..Malini
Thanks Malini.I was browsing your blog site too,good work.I am a more recent blogger:-)Glad that Anika has cousin's around to share her time with.
@MDM: Hmm that's a hard spot to fill.. But don't despair, you do have close family and a good set of friends around. Besides you can do webcams and later phone calls and video chats when D grows older.
Not quite the substitute for one of one physical time, but then you cannot have everything !
One thing that used to help us when we were in the US was to make detailed videos and send home. That way even granparents feel like they really know the child and hence can interact more easily when they meet them..
Take care and a big hug to D from me.
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